Independent Thinkers

I think it's generally accepted that it's good to raise children who are smart, good and independent (among other traits). You want to send them off into the world knowing how to handle themselves so they don't go to college not knowing how to wash their own clothes or cook meals more intricate than pb&j sandwiches. You want them to be kind and thoughtful and studious. You want them to have fun and make good decisions. You want them to hold down jobs and express opinions and you want them to be happy.

The problem with all of this is that to reach that outcome you have to do the work. You have to deal with toddlers learning to exert that independence. They are stubborn and they are willing to do whatever it takes to get their way. You've been trained. You are so far past that stage that it's hard to remember how difficult it is to go through. You just want it to pass so you can enjoy more of those delightful, imaginative conversations that peek through every so often (things like, "I've never ever been in a spaceship. Have YOU been in a spaceship?" and "Do cars like to dance?") You want to get past the potty training and the pacifier weening. You want to sail on by "making it through" a nap time that involves no nap. You want to make it through to days where you don't feel like you've spent the entire day yelling at the kids ("No! We do not play IN the toilet!" "No! We do not throw matchbox cars at the baby!" etc. etc. etc.).

Having said that, I much prefer the toddler stage. The stage where they still think it's amazingly exciting to stay home and bake cookies. The stage where when the poo does end up in the potty, they feel the need to name it according to shape ("Look! It's jet poop!"). The stage where they don't think you are a giant nerd who does nothing right. Because I got a taste of that this weekend with my older nephews. 8 and 11. I'm telling you...that's more birth control for me than any number of babies. Babies generally don't roll their eyes at you and ignore every single thing you say. Toddlers do, but there are those in between times where they say things like, "I'm going to hug you forever!" and "Let me give you kisses!"

I genuinely look forward to having my own children...even knowing all of this. But in the meantime, here's hoping Monkey and Bug and I make it through the summer.